Touch Me I’m Sick… Mudhoney (1965)

I’m one of the generation that knew of this film firstly as the name of a band, Seattle grunge pioneers Mudhoney famous for one of the greatest song titles of the period Sweet Young Thing Ain’t Sweet no More and many more swinging sledgehammer hits.

So, 25 years after I last saw Mudhoney play (in the Kilburn Empire if memory serves, supporting Sonic Youth?) I’m finally getting round to finding out just what it was they named themselves after… and it all makes sense.

Hal Hopper and Lorna Maitland

Russ Meyer… what can you say about a man who is truly his own genre and, exploitation to one side, a film-maker of skill in terms of cinematography and narration. Sometimes his stories overwhelm themselves with too much confection… they become sickly-sweet cocktails of knowing soft-core, the odd bit of sublime and an overdose of the ridiculous. It’s as if Russ is trying to cover himself by casting a joke over proceedings: never mind the sexual violence, look at the serious messages about society and the miss-use of power (really).

Antoinette Christiani

Here the wife-beating, drunken antics from Sidney (Hal Hopper) drive much of the narrative tension and yet we’re expected to feel some pity when his own plans collapse in on him after he can’t help himself commit one more act of rape. Nothing in the film up to that point has prepared us to care a jot for his civil liberty and right to a fair trial.

Meyer is far more at home staging lingering shots of  the beautiful “mute” Eula (Rena Horten) standing naked washing her hair and bending over more than enough to highlight her impressive physical profile… there’s some action to the left but I honestly can’t remember what it was…

Important to the plot and understanding the film...not gratuitous at all...

That’s not to say the film is that flawed that it’s not enjoyable; it’s just more than a little uneven. Meyer gets the balance far better when he tries harder for full-on drama (Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!), swinging pop-sploitation (Beyond the Valley of the Dolls) and, let’s be honest, comedy-porn (Vixen).

Sociopathic Sidney

Hopper gives a superbly disturbing performance as the sloshed and sociopathic Sidney and blows most of the cast off screen as a result. It’s 1933 and the depression is in full swing… a stranger arrives in a small mid-Western town of Spooner, Missouri, en route to California. His mother named him after his intended destination and he goes by the name of Calif McKinney (John Furlong). He sees a pair of lovely legs belonging to the childlike Eula and talks with her “employer” Maggie Marie (the scarcely-regal Princess Livingston) who runs a happy-go-lucky cat house which also features the curvaceous Clara Belle (Lorna Maitland).

Calif meets the locals

Maggie sends Calif off to find work at the farm of Lute Wade (Stuart Lancaster) and here he encounters Lute’s niece Hannah Brenshaw (Antoinette Christiani) who is inexplicably married to the much older and character-flawed Sidney. Hannah’s husband not only abuses her when he’s too drunk to afford one of Maggie’s girls he also takes a knife to Calif’s throat – a way of testing and establishing dominance but we suspect Calif may be made of sterner stuff.

Sidney welcomes Calif

So it proves as he begins to win the trust of Lute and Hannah whilst Sidney continues to drink himself into oblivion… Lute decides to leave his money to Calif so that he can protect it from Sidney and marry Hannah. It’s a good plan and it just might work.

Sidney continues to challenge all around him and hatches a plan with the local preacher (Frank Bolger, who was responsible for some of the Meyer over-blown voiceovers, most notably the “sex and vi-olence…” introduction to Faster, Pussycat…) and denounces Cailf and Hannah for starting a relationship even though she is still married.

Antoinette Christiani, Stuart Lancaster and John Furlong

This may well not be true but it’s seemingly enough for the townsfolk to take against them – who knew they’d be so puritanical?! This unexpected turn of events is less than convincing and it will get worse…

Meanwhile Lute dies and Sidney creates a scene at the funeral after discovering the old man’s plan to divert his inheritance. This time Sidney can’t cheat his way to an advantage and Calif knocks him all over the burial site, eventually sending him into the grave along with Lute.

The Reverend is compromised...

Sidney runs off determined on revenge but he’s on a course that will bring the town down on him like a ton of bricks… we can’t say he hasn’t got it coming but strange loyalties come into play in the closing minutes as blood runs hot...

Under pressure

Dusty verdict: The film has some good touches; Meyer lingers on his characters feet at the start of the film, creating a disassociation with some of the damage being done by the bodies above. The feet all seem to be better mannered than the arms, legs and heads attached… as one after another freak of nature is revealed.

Hannah and Calif

Hannah and Calif are the film’s sympathetic heart of course although sometimes it feels as if they’re just there to be brutalized by Sidney and then to eventually try and save him... He’s certainly a sad man especially once he’s seen that being bad doesn’t always work out… but he’s also a deeply unpleasant creation. Whilst Calif himself is finally rescued by the love of a good woman do the audience really feel compassion for Sidney as a wounded animal? Maybe that’s Meyer’s point although I’m not so sure it means much more than that and there is Meyer’s problem: he ducks and dives issues so much that you can’t tell what he really stands for.

Russ makes his point...

If you like his films then you’ll no doubt like Mudhoney although I’m not so sure you’d like the band although. as with Mr Meyer, they are altogether less concerned about what their audience thought of them.

Mudhoney is available on DVD from Amazon whilst details of the band and its current activities can be found here - they have a new album and are about to tour!

Russ Meyer slays the sixties… Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970)

We all think we know Russ Meyer or at least his legendary fascination with actresses of a certain stature. He delivered some undeniable cult classics such as Faster Pussycat, Kill, Kill along with comedy erotica at the acceptable end of soft porn such as Vixen and Up!

Here, with the surprising assistance of leading film critic, Roger Ebert he delivered a smart satire on the late-60’s teen dream taking swipes at young and old in a land where the moral compass got lost somewhere between Haight-Ashbury and Saigon. The dream was almost over and this film gives it a kicking that seems to mature with age.

Casey, Pet and Kelly: The Carrie Nations!

Originally intended as a follow-up to the much derided pot-boiler – or dexy’s-fry-up – The Valley of the Dolls, the film was written by one of that film’s deriders-in-chief, Mr Ebert who had described it as a two-star “dirty soap opera” that tried “to raise itself to the level of sophisticated pornography but fails…” Did Mr Ebert succeed in bettering that score?

On the surface there are many traditional Meyer elements which would suggest that pornography was on the agenda: two of the leads where Playmates of the Month: Dolly Read (in 1966) and Cynthia Myers (1968) and it’s pretty clear why… There’s an excess of sexual and pharmaceutical activity in the orgy of self-indulgence forming the upper limits of most characters’ ambitions.

Duncan McLeod and Cynthia Myers

Bad things happen to almost all of those involved and there’s a moralising agenda that’s made bearable by the comic swagger of the direction as well as the performances. Amongst its many faults Valley of the Dolls took itself way too seriously and there’s no danger of that ever happening in this film which just about clings onto the mainstream.

The film follows the progress of an all-girl rock band as they progress from high school dances to the major leagues with the inevitable consequences…

Dolly Read

The band are Kelly Mac Namara (Dolly Read) on vocals and guitar, Casey Anderson (Cynthia Myers) on bass and Petronella “Pet” Danforth (Marcia McBroom) on drums and, initially, they are called The Kelly Affair and managed by Kelly’s upstanding boyfriend Harris Allsworth (David Gurian).

Marcia McBroom

They travel to Los Angeles aiming to stay with Kelly’s aunt Susan Lake (Phyllis Davis) who, rather generously, offers her niece a slice of her inheritance much to the annoyance of her seedy financial advisor Porter Hall (Duncan McLeod): Susan’s so nice you wonder what she’s doing using Mr Hall for advice on anything…

Aunt Susan who's only vice is being "too good"...

Susan’s a designer and “in” on the pop scene so she facilitates an introduction with its leading light, a Spector/Svengali figure by the name of Ronnie “Z-Man” Barzell (John LaZar) at one of his swinging parties. In the background play The Strawberry Alarm Clock three years after their psychedelia-by-numbers smash hit Incense and Peppermints and two years after the rapidly evolving progressive music scene passed them by. They’re the perfect band for the scene though – a band who cashed in on the style without the substance of hippiedom… they weren’t exactly Love or The Doors.

The girls join The Strawberry Alarm Clock on stage

Z-Man gets the girls to join them on stage and after an impressive set he re-christens them The Carrie Nations after the nineteenth century temperance activist...oh…how…ironic…

Meanwhile Pet meets a smart young waiter/legal trainee Emerson Thorne (Harrison Page)… whilst quiet Casey – daughter of a Senator – meets Roxanne (Erica Gavin) who can barely disguise her delight as her eyes dart approvingly over the younger woman: “I’d like to design for you”, she says thinking more of the contents than the clothes…

The gang survey Z-Man's awesome party scene

Kelly is given the grand tour by Z-Man who introduces the various characters with pseudo-Shakespearian couplets from the gigolo Lance Rocke (Michael Blodgett) to the insatiable porn star Ashley St. Ives (Edy Williams). The party’s a bit like the disco sections of Laugh In when various characters stop to tell brief jokes: just substitute Godie Hawn, Rowan and Martin et al for some altogether more freakish characters all drawn from Meyer’s over-developed sense of carnival irony.

Edy Williams cuts a rug...

From here on in, the girls upward trajectory distances them from their roots and common sense…

Z-Man easily outmanoeuvres Harris to take control of the band and nudges Kelly in the direction of Lance in order to break her link with the hapless ex-manager... Despairing, Harris succumbs to Miss St. Ives’s charms falling into a life of self-prescribed numb submission; helpless to stop Kelly’ s drift into success.

Playmate of the Month, May 1966...

Kelly becomes more self-centred, pushing her aunt for a bigger share of the inheritance (even though, presumably, her own stash of bread is growing exponentially…) in the face of self-serving opposition from Porter Hall.

Pet romances the studious Emerson yet falls for a one-night stand with heavyweight boxing champion Randy Black (James Iglehart) who almost runs the young lawyer over and beats him up for good measure.

Edy on the beach

Harris is humiliated by Ashley as he fails to rise to the occasion on the beach outside another of Z-Man’s parties and is then beaten by Lance as he tries to reconnect with Kelly… In drug-addled despair he takes advantage of Casey who throws him out. Nowhere left to turn he tries to kill himself by jumping from high above the stage as The Carrie Nations perform on live national TV…
He survives, just about – will this be a turning point for him and even for Kelly?

Superwoman and a disapproving Jungle Boy

Just as you think happy endings might start to accumulate, Meyer and Ebert throw in the shocking dénouement that partially starts the film… clearly influenced by the Manson Family murders, the segment starts with Z-Man inviting Lance, Casey and Roxanne for a Crowley-esque evening of drug-fuelled magic which he hopes will see his alter ego, Superwoman, consummate a dominant relationship with Lance’s Jungle Boy. Naturally Casey is cast as the Boy Wonder and Roxanne the Caped Crusader…

But, whilst the Dynamic Duo enjoy a night of passion – tastefully documented by Meyer, lingering longer than over any other coupling – Jungle Boy is not quite so interested in playing his role… Superwoman becomes displeased and… let’s just say; heads will roll...

Torn between two managers

Dusty Verdict: Beyond the Valley of the Dolls is rightly regarded as an imperfect jewel of period playfulness with some really colourful performances and a soundtrack packed with pop-psychedelia.

The girls in the band are all hyper pretty and the ex-playmate who delivers in the acting stakes is Cynthia Myers who manages to inject the right amount of uncertain vulnerability into a character who is lost even before the nightmares of success begin... she eventually finds herself more convincingly than the others who follow more prosaic paths to self-realisation...

Cynthia Myers

The supporting characters play it mostly for laughs and are so often extreme it works against any deeper drama: you feel safe in the knowledge that Meyer will always go for the comedy and the sex first... well almost.

The ending strikes now as opportunist and unnecessarily cruel and the coda showing Kelly and Harris driving a Chevrolet Corvette Stingray into a summer-sunny valley doesn't wipe away the bad taste. Was there a serious point here or cheap-shot moralising: the film apologising for reveling in its own exploitation?

Kelly's classic Chevrolet Corvette Stingray

A sonorous voice wraps up the film by briefly summarising the characters' faults, failures and fates... as with all that proceeded it it's hard to decide whether it is serious or a joke: Ebert and Meyer hedging their bets one out of habit and the other out of necessity? As the voice-over says, you, the audience, must decide for yourselves...

Writing later, Ebert, who's critical faculties made him one of the greatest of film reviewers, said:  "It's an anthology of stock situations, characters, dialogue, clichés and stereotypes, set to music and manipulated to work as exposition and satire at the same time; it's cause and effect, a wind-up machine to generate emotions, pure movie without message..."

Those causes still have effect and if you haven't seen it I'd recommend Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. It's available at very reasonable prices from Amazon... as is the groovy soundtrack.

Ashley St. Ives readies herself in the Rolls...